Today I bought a new computer and I promise to me more careful with it. I can actually remember the moment earlier this week when Stokely (my old computer's name) decided that he had enough of my abuse and bowed out. I was in bed looking at the computer and instead of making room on the messy night stand, I lowered it over the side of the bed and let it drop, about 2 inches from the hardwood floor. The next morning, I couldn't get Windows to run, and the rest is history. I was looking up why or how a hard drive could be ruined, and dropping the machine as well as chronic improper shut downs could be the culprits. I am guilty of both. To add insult to injury, none of my files are backed up, so I have no music, no photos and no zillion versions of cover letters and resumes. It was an expensive mistake, but I am moving forward with light weight and svelte Delilah (my new computer's name).
I had a 45 minute conversation with my Dad this evening, and I was truly comforted. I called him because Lauren was getting on my nerves, and he helped me feel like I wasn't crazy for my point of view. Even though I can't agree with the majority of his decisions lately, he is responsible for so many of the personality pieces of me. The one that came up today was "god bless the child that has got his own". Lauren seemed frustrated that I didn't call her for advice about getting my computer and implied that I spent way too much. My dad was like it doesn't matter how much you spent, you handled your business, he understood why I wouldn't have waited for a hook up to save a dollar, when I already had the conviction and resources to take care of it myself. To see my thought process echoed through the words of another person is always welcomed, gave me validation.
He went on to tell me how he misses his old life with my mom and my siblings. It is hard to describe if you weren't there, but from about 1990 to 2005, 321 E. Rimrock was the place to be. Our house was full of LOVE, we were always laughing and enjoying our time together. We did have some challenges and even when we fought, we always came back together, in that house. I don't think that we are finished seeing the after effects of the loss of everyone's rock (my mom) and our house. What choice do we have? Mope in the rubble or take the love and go build something else.
